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Friday, August 31, 2001
 Russell Branyan struck out four times last night against the Red Sox. There's two schools of thought about this picture:(1) Branyan has struck out in 42% of his at-bats this year. You'd think he'd be used to it by now. (2) Branyan has struck out in 42% of his at-bats this year. I would vent my frustration in the same way, if I had the strength. I know just how he feels... in eighth grade I batted leadoff because I was fast. What Coach O'B could not foresee is that I would strike out in about 80% of my at-bats. Sure, I could beat out a lot of grounders, but first I had to make contact. Well by keeping me at leadoff for the season, Coach thought he was avoiding making me feel bad... but it doesn't feel great to let the team down on a regular basis. Fast forward one year to the big leagues (high school), when winning games is more important than feelings... I became a designated fielder, and I was happy about it. True story.
New Sports Guy article where he answers readers' e-mails. Some "That Guy" mentions, some fantasy football tips, and the age-old question "whatever happened to little kids getting trapped in wells?"
N.B.: I e-mailed the Sports Guy and told him to check out my site on the day after I went to Radiohead, and I wrote that list of "that guys" at a concert. I also commended him on his work and mentioned that I send readers his way. He actually took 5 seconds to check the site out, and wrote me back. He said "Hey I was at that concert. I was wildly impressed by them."... He's a busy man. Later I realized that the list I wrote wasn't very funny. Oh well. Tuesday, August 28, 2001
It has been a while since I made you think. Here's a brain teaser.
SS_SS ----> possess EE_EE ----> beekeeper DD_DD ----> ? * The answer has been posted (hit the comment link to the right). Sunday, August 26, 2001
Here's another cool little game: "Spider".
I also enjoy the occasional game of Alchemy when I'm bored. Saturday, August 25, 2001
It has been a while since my last update. I have become rather busy at work, sometimes forcing me to become busy with work at home, after work. Other times, I just haven't had the motivation. I realized there is more to life than staring at a computer screen. Like staring at a television screen. I also have been "reading" a "book". I'm a bit rusty, but I'm enjoying it. Thanks to Renlow (a.k.a. "Dad") for... well, having hundreds of books to choose from, and being able to recommend a few. Usually he forgets what books are about right after he reads them, but the really good ones stand out in his mind, and he pointed me toward some of his favorites. Right now I'm reading "Rainbow Six" by Tom Clancy. It be good.
Had another frisbee tournament last weekend, the big end-of-season one. The shade tent kept me from my usual frisbee-time sun-punishment, but I was hurtin for certain for a couple days afterwards, due to soreness and discovery of muscles that I previously had never used. At any rate, here are some photos. The picture on the right is sister Kate.    Menlow's got some cool pictures up from his excursion to the northwestern United States. Yet again, poker night = Sox loss. Check out NetFlix. Rent DVD's via the internet. Huge selection, no late fees, ratings & recommendations... I've heard rave reviews. A couple new additions to EnlowSpeak, both from church. "Spray" and "Not... in... CHURCH". The other day at lunch at the Longhorn Steakhouse, the bartender says to me quietly: "That dude behind me in the black shirt said he's on Who Wants to be A Millionaire tonight. He won't tell me how he did..." To someone like Joe the Bartender I'd normally say "hm" and continue eating my chowder. But this guy's a good guy, so I oblige him and slowly turn around. The alleged contestant is sitting sideways in his booth with his legs up, looking back at me with an "I'm better than you" smirk on his face. So I quickly turn back. What a loser, going around telling strangers he'll be on Millionaire to get attention. Ooh, how'd you do? When's it on? What's Regis like in person? Will you sign my baked potato? Can I buy you a drink? Can I get a picture of us? Is that your final answer? BAHAHAHAHA Go back to 1999, punk. Hmm, I'm judgmental. Friday, August 17, 2001
Thursday, August 16, 2001
Wednesday, August 15, 2001
Check out this cool little game, "Levers". You may want to wait till you have some free time... it's fun but pretty tricky.
  Karen and I went to Radiohead last night. It was awesome (duh). I figured out why people like concerts. That was the first really big concert I had been to, unless you count MC Hammer (and I don't)... but it was so cool to see this complex and beautiful music performed live. Even the songs which I tend to skip on the CD sounded great. I was impressed by lead singer Thom Yorke's virtuosity and talent. The drummer, though somewhat uncharismatic, was also exceptional, especially during "Idioteque". I marvelled at their ability to effortlessly do songs with weird time signatures like "Morning Bell" and especially "Pyramid Song".  I want to be a rock star when I grow up. Actually I'd settle for being a DJ. Kid Koala [left] opened last night, and the boy had skills. He started with the music from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and added a beat behind it... pretty cool. He ended with some old jazz, with a solo trumpeter that he manipulated and distorted with pleasant results.I had a great time last night, but I noticed some... things. Recently the Sports Guy listed top twenty annoying fans at a baseball game... I shall now give my list of top twelve annoying fans at a concert, from least annoying to most annoying. (13) That guy who wears a shirt of a band that's similiar to the band you're watching, but obscure enough that those who recognize it think "he's cool". (Last night's example: "doves". Okay, I'm stretching with this one. I'm just jealous of his shirt.) (12) That guy who wears a shirt of the band whose concert you're at. (Didn't see this last night, but borrowed the reference from The Sports Guy.) (11) That guy who tries to be cool by wearing something normally deemed uncool. (An example from last night: a dude in the ugliest "USA" baseball cap I've ever seen.) You see, he's cool because he doesn't care what other people think. Okay I'm stretching again. (10) That guy who holds up a stupid sign that the band will never see, like he's at a ball game hoping to get on TV or something. (Last night's sign: "Nobody Does It Better".) (9) That guy who calls his buddy and holds the cell phone up so his friend can hear the concert. (8) That guy who doesn't applaud after the set, decreasing your chances of getting an encore. (Oh wait, that was most of last night's crowd.) (7) That guy who squeezes past you into the crowd ahead of you, and all the people in his posse who follow him. (6) That guy who insists on dancing when everyone around him is stationary, Packt Like Sardines in a Crushd Tin Box. (5) That guy who puts his topful girlfriend on his shoulders right in front of you. (4) That guy who talks really loud near you during a relatively quiet and low-key song, which you are desperately trying to appreciate. (3) That guy who attempts to crowd-surf far from the front of the crowd, where it is least welcomed and least successful. (2) That guy who waits at the bottleneck exit of the concert after the show, either looking for someone he knows or trying to be seen, severely hampering mass-egress. (1) That guy who yells "YEAHHHH!!!!!!" after literally the first note of each song, making all but the smartest of those around him think that he can name that tune in one note. Tuesday, August 14, 2001
 I just got back from the dentist. Looks like I'm going to need another root canal. Excellent. Six months ago I checked in with the dentist because of a toothache, and he basically said "I dunno, take these [penicillin] and come back when it hurts again." Thanks doc. I started to notice the tooth again over the weekend, and then Sunday night I was awakened by the familiar throbbing pain of bacteria hammering away. Fortunately, having learned from last time, I had a sizeable jar of extra-strength pain reliever handy. Had that not been around, I think I would have quickly been rummaging around my apartment looking for an ice skate so I could take care of that bad boy Castaway-style, and get back to sleep/unconsciousness. It hurt. So I need to get my penicillin prescription filled... maybe I'll go do that at tooth-hurty. BAAAAHAHAHA
T-minus about five hours till the Radiohead concert. This marks the end of Song of the Day's Radiohead Week. Unfortunately I missed Song of the Day for the first time yesterday... oh well. Now that the streak has been broken, I don't feel so bad about going on S.O.D. hiatus for a little while. So that's what's going to happen... otherwise I think the quality of my remarks would plummet further than it already has.
Monday, August 13, 2001
What a crappy way to end a streak. Greg Maddux was instructed to intentionally walk Steve Finley yesterday, to end his National League record streak of 72 and a third innings without issuing a walk. Now that's all well and good, but I guess it's not surprising that whenever I've watched the sports news recently, Maddux was getting smacked around. That's what happens when you throw so many strikes.
Friday, August 10, 2001
ME: Excuse me, I'm ready to order.
JOE THE BARTENDER: Okay. ME: I think I'm gonna go for some soup... What's the soup of the day? JOE THE BARTENDER: I think it might be clam chowder, let me go check. COUNTRY WESTERN AMBIENCE: "You ain't no stumblin' block... yer just a steppin' stone..." MY BRAIN: Please make it stop. You already made me sit through "It's a Love Thing" and "She's All Kinds of Gone". Why must the food be so good, and the music so bad? ME (10 minutes later): So... is it clam chowder? JOE THE BARTENDER: Yeah, it will be out in a second. MY BRAIN: You are an idiot. Not only did I not order the chowder, but I want some freakin lunch! Stop flirting with the waitresses and get me some eats, boy! ME: Oh, I'm also ready to order the rest of my meal. Chicken tenders, baked potato, fries. JOE THE BARTENDER: Right-o. ME (after receiving my food and eating my chicken and fries): Hey could I get some silverware? JOE THE FUNNIEST MAN ALIVE: No. MY BRAIN: That is the best joke I have ever heard. There's a big tip in store for you, my good man! COUNTRY WESTERN AMBIENCE: "Don't forget to feed the jukebox while I'm gone..." MY BRAIN: Ooh, some much-needed inspiration for Song of the Day! Thursday, August 09, 2001
On Sunday my ultimate frisbee team had a mini-tournament. And wow was it hot. Our new uniforms helped slightly: Nike "dri-fit", much lighter than the gray cotton wet blankets we wore for a while. But halfway through the fourth game I had to hit the showers, and by that I mean take myself out of the game and sit on the sidelines with no actual shower in my near future. I felt okay just sitting down, but the last time I subbed in I was huffing and puffing after minimal effort. Safety first, that's my motto. Karen was nice enough to invite the team over afterwards for some whirlpoolage... after all, what better way to assuage dehydration than beer and a hot tub?
I just wanted to put some pictures up because I don't like seeing so much text on my site. It usually isn't a problem because I am a man of few words. We didn't get too many good pictures Sunday, so I'll post some from a while back.    Looking forward to today's game... it's supposed to be 100 degrees out, but it'll feel like 115. So that will be fun. Wednesday, August 08, 2001
Thanks to this bloke for recommending my site. He seems to think sports enthusiasts are few and far between in the blogger community. I concur.
Sometimes I wish I lived in the UK so I could really become a true soccer (or, if you will, "football") fan. I used to be a huge MLS fan, and I'd go to pretty much every Revolution home game. This year I haven't been to any games. The MLS just isn't doing it for me... maybe what's missing is my compatriots' love for The Beautiful Game, the most popular sport in the world. It sucks when I'm flipping through the channels, I stop at a soccer game, and my roommates yell at me. I wish I could just go to the pub, have a pint and take in a match with me mates.
The artist formerly known as the BSG has done it again. The 20 Most Annoying Fans at a Baseball Game. Hi-larious. I'm talkin hee-haw funny.
This is funny... it's basically a detailed and lengthy account of some dude tormenting major corporations by sending them prank e-mails. He seems to have way too much free time on his hands. Thank goodness he puts it to good use: quality entertainment.
Tuesday, August 07, 2001
I was playing around with the king-graphing stuff and I found something interesting. I was fiddling with the six states of New England... it didn't take me too long to figure out that it was impossible for all six states to fit in the same grid (E would have to be adjacent to nine different letters, and that's impossible). But I also figured out that no grouping of five of the states could fit in a grid. To make a long story short, the best I could do was fit a certain group of three states in the same grid, and that surprised me. Can you do three? What about four states?
(The object is to fit all the different letters in a grid so you can move a letter at a time horizontally, vertically or diagonally to spell out words. For example, the grid below contains both "Vermont" and "Connecticut".)
I also got the five great lakes (HURON, ONTARIO, MICHIGAN, ERIE, SUPERIOR) to fit in the same grid. Try it out.  One week from today I go see Radiohead. Time to get in the mood... time for LenLowLand's Song of the Day to begin "Radiohead Week". As a result, I may have to resort to songs that you people have heard. And that's... okay. It is becoming increasingly difficult to post songs that you people have not heard and that I really like.Monday, August 06, 2001
Sweet, Hatteberg just lined into a triple play. I had never seen one in "real life" before... but I've heard stories. Like John Valentin's unassisted triple play a couple years back.
Update (8:40): I suppose that grand slam makes up for it... Scott HATTEBERG!!!!
Here are some amusing musings (is that redundant?) I got from a blog called "Humor"... oh and definitely read the posting after it. Funny poop.
 If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with naked fat people. What happens if you get scared half to death twice? He's not a vegetarian because he loves animals; he's a vegetarian because he hates plants. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? When sign makers go on strike is anything written on their signs? What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?
Holy Hannah, the Cleveland Indians were down by 12 runs twice last night, and they came back to win the game 15-14 in 11 innings!
Thursday, August 02, 2001
Whoops, nine straight posts about sports.... time for some random thoughts to wake up everyone who fell asleep.
Speaking of people falling asleep, I haven't heard a peep about the zodiac sign thing. So I'm guessing nobody cares that I found two completely different ways to fit seven months of the year into the same grid? I guess all I know how to do is cater to the extremes of the audience spectrum... sports fans on one side, geeks on the other. And a picture of Antonio Banderas thrown in for the ladies. (Forgive my stereotyping, I know it's not accurate. After all, I'm a geek who loves sports... and have you seen Desperado?) Why is Planet of the Apes on the cover of the TV Guide? Happy Birthday Menlow. Late-breaking news from The Onion: "Non-Alcoholic Beer Inventor Unveils New Non-Adhesive Glue"  This morning, in between changing CD's in my car, Howard Stern was on the air. He was talking about the tragic death of Minnesota Vikings tackle Korey Stringer, and he played clips of emotional outbursts from Randy Moss and other teammates. Very moving stuff. Immediately I had to put in some music... not because I didn't want to hear about it, just because I knew it wouldn't be long before Howard & friends made an inappropriate joke. Howard's usually pretty funny, and when he was talking about the tape he was serious, but still... it's Howard.Say, that reminds me. After that last paragraph, it seems ironic that I find this picture of "Ozzy Oswald" really humorous. Am I the only one? Wednesday, August 01, 2001
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